Something that is really important and probably isn't talked about enough is the concept of no means no. Escorts out there, please share your experiences and thoughts on this.

We're in an industry where we're not really surprised by a lot. This usually means that we are pretty clear about the services that we do and don't offer. I know that I outline things really clearly in my profile to make sure that there's no confusion about things like showering, services offered - and especially protection. I guess I understand that maybe sometimes there are going to be some questions or requests that might still come up. This doesn't really make it okay though. Policies are policies and no means no. One way that I might explain this that might make sense to everyone is to say that when it comes to your overall experience, you're probably going to get something that's less than what you hope for when you ask a question that you already know the answer to. It's not meaning that it's on purpose but when you make someone uncomfortable, that's what ends up happening even if it's not intentional. No always means no and things that are clearly stated are not up for bargaining.

This might not be the 9-5 profession that you're used to, but that still doesn't mean that the policies and terms are up for debate. Escorts are professionals and this is their job. If you wouldn't want to have extra tasks added to your plate at your place of employment, then you can be very sure that an escort doesn't want to deal with that either. I know that I try to make things as clear as possible for my clients and potential clients so that there's no need to have to address this. Most escorts do. If there are any exceptions to certain things that can be made down the road, that would be done at the discretion of the escort and would be an agreement between her and her regular client. These are rare exceptions to the rule though. The general rule that you should always depend on, is the rule that everything that's already set as a policy is in place and that asking for anything above and beyond is inappropriate. It's our job to deliver on the services that we provide. Absolutely. Going above and beyond is at our discretion, though.

This is a good thing to read for men because I feel like we don't always know what's what. I know that when I first started to use escort services I was asking for things directly because I thought that was what I should do. I did have an escort once tell me thought that it was really important for me to read the services offered on the profile and to ask any questions that I wasn't sure of in advance. She explained why and I immediately felt bad. This is a profession and it's not something that you decide on the spot. The services are agreed upon before the meeting so since that experience I've been sure to know what services are offered in advance, and I've even sent messages about what I want in advance as well so that I know we're both on the same page when we meet. This has actually made things a lot more comfortable all around and I also find that it has made the experience that much more enjoyable as well. I felt badly for making a woman feel uncomfortable in the past and I'm glad that I know what to do now. I'd hope that any other man reading this will do the same.

Yes, as a man this is something that I've also been guilty of. I think it's because I was paying more attention to the pictures than I was to the services offered and that made me end up in a frustrated situation when I got to visit the escort I had booked. I was asking for things and wondering why she was saying no to my requests, and then she actually showed me her profile and I immediately got it. I hadn't really looked and I didn't ask any questions before I went to see her either. I assumed that it was all fair game and now I know that's not the way it works. I actually paid her for that night and left after talking with her for a bit because I realized that I had wasted her time and that I hadn't done what I should on my end. It's pretty easy from the man's side to simply read the profile and see what services each escort offers. As the ladies on here have said as well, no means no and if they tell you they don't want to do something that needs to be respected. Do your research before you book and you'll end up having a far more comfortable experience. These ladies are professionals, and they have to provide every service that we ask for. There are all kinds of escorts who offer all kinds of different services and all it takes is a few minutes to read through the profiles to see what each offers. Also again making sure that you message about what you're looking to experience during your booked time and having them get back to you with approval makes for a far more enjoyable experience. It ensures that things aren't going to be awkward and that it'll be relaxed overall.

To be honest, as a man who's older and seen a lot of escorts in my time I have to say that it's really surprising that this should have to be an issue. Especially when there are now websites and all of the information that you could need is right there for you to see before you even contact the escort. If there are profiles that don't have a lot of information then it may be a good idea to bypass them altogether because there's every opportunity to put all of the necessary information on a profile, so if someone's not doing that then I'm probably not interested in seeing them. It's different in the cases where they ask you to contact them directly for pricing and services. That's okay. When an escort says no though, it means no. Also, when there are policies in play like showers or especially protection, these aren't things that are up for negotiation. Just go with the policy and don't ruin your experience by making things awkward or uncomfortable. It's better all around.

Thanks for all of these comments, and as well to the men who replied because having you share your thoughts and experiences from the other perspective helps a lot as well.